I’m already getting notifications on Facebook for my birthday, June 7, even though for many of the IWSG and other readers it’s still Wednesday (and it’s still technically okay to tag this #IWSG on Twitter, right?)
So about my birthday. It could be better, could be a lot worse. I thought I’d have more writing done, and I’ve been “trying to write” a hell of a lot more than actually writing. It’s at the point now where it’s get serious or do something else entirely.
Writing still has an undeniable appeal to me, even through the emotional fatigue I feel now. I’m taking steps to control anxiety and my impulses, and it’s worked – to the point that I don’t feel strongly happy or sad. Based on what I’ve read that’s actually kind of ‘normal’ – depression and anxiety are more likely to take the form of emotional ‘static’ than constant sadness or loneliness.
I’ve had some expensive problems happen lately, too. My car engine needed a costly overhaul, and I had to replace my tires. The family tablet was dropped and has a cracked screen that little fingers shouldn’t touch. We have to figure out something the kids can do this summer without spending too much money.
My writing has taken pen and paper form during these problems. I find myself handwriting more often – it seems to help me work out these issues. It is also very heartening to see the notifications on Facebook. I do appreciate those, and they are making my day much easier.
For #IWSG and others I want to ask:
What do you like to do on your birthday?
What do you write about?
Is it just another day on your latest novel or story, or do you find yourself writing different things or trying different ways of writing?
I think I know what this blog will be now.
It won’t be much of a change, just a different approach. I’m looking at ways now to incorporate the exercise and healthy lifestyle changes I need along with writing. I’ll write about the activities and exercises I do to make sure I can write fiction, and about how writing fiction keeps me going back to that exercise.
I’ll write about how I’m addressing the issues in my last post, and share some of the writing that comes from the process.
I finally feel ready to return to writing. The ideas never stop! I have so many of them, and a terribly slow typing speed along with so many other things demanding my time. But I have to try, and I have to get back out to the writing groups that mean so much to me.
I hope readers will find some value as I talk about how I deal with these problems, and how my physical exercise and weight loss ties in with writing fiction.
Keep writing. I know I will.
I’ve talked a bit recently about how I’m not sure how to use my website now, and where I want to go.
Here’s what I know so far:
- I can’t do reviews or previews too often. Good reviews take time away from writing, and I need to write.
- Far Flung, flawed as it may be, will get finished. I will get it edited and prepared professionally, despite money issues – I’ve seen too many crappy ebooks with garbage covers, and I will not let my story be among them. If I have to get it edited chapter by chapter, so be it.
- Work on Far Flung will be followed immediately by work on its sequel, which I will submit to the Launchpad Competition. If I understand correctly, I get a free submission this year thanks to my placement in the list last year.
- I need therapy and I can’t afford it. Betterhelp.com is an option I’ve tried, and I don’t have money for it now. There’s also 7 cups, which has a premium version I can’t afford, but there seems to be some amount of free help I can get, so I’ll look into that. Face-to-face options near me are very limited, but perhaps 1 or 2 sessions a month will be manageable.
- I need to somehow improve myself despite being completely shut out by my wife. We can’t afford a separation. We can’t afford couples counseling. I can’t see my friends very often. So I’m stuck doing this myself until I make some change that she can recognize.
- I need to write every day, and my online presence will suffer for it. I wish I could do more reviews, guests posts, and other things, but I write too slowly for all that. My fiction takes priority.
I can give some idea of a timeline, though. Far Flung can get to the professional editing stage this year. I think having a draft ready for publication is an attainable goal for the end of this year. Actual publication is more likely to be in 2019.
As for my self-improvement? I’m exercising, and I’ve cut soda out entirely. No weight loss I can report yet. I still have to figure out which therapy is good for me that I can actually afford, but I think it will be focused on general anxiety and various issues with my family.
This blog, when I’m confident I can write for it AND keep up my fiction writing, will look at the ways my therapy for anxiety ties in with writing fiction. Maybe this blog can help other anxious writers. I think mental health issues and being good at writing overlap far more often than any of us like to admit, and it would be worthwhile to explore that correlation.
I hate to disappoint this wonderful following! In 3 days, the campaign will expire and everyone will get a refund. I’m tempted to extend it, but … no, I don’t think it will be a good idea. It was a fun experience, and I may have found an interesting method of gathering support, but there just wasn’t enough positive response. I had a few friends and family members pitch in, but I think neither the idea of the story nor the Inkshares method appealed to them. With the bad relationship with my wife, debt, and anxiety taking over, I simply cannot campaign any longer.
I’m looking into alternatives. I will self-publish Far Flung most likely – I will use this wonderful list of followers and contacts and ask everyone to follow along as I update progress on the fate of Far Flung. My next draft will go to Launch Pad early next year – they might be able to help me find someone interested in publishing. After that, I’ll be looking for ways to get a professional edit done. I’ve no idea how I’ll get the $$$ for that, but … one step at a time, I suppose.
Anyway, my thanks to everyone. You’ll get your refund shortly, though I wish it were a promise of a book instead.
This was an amazing experience, despite this outcome.
Thank you, one and all, for pre-ordering, following, re-tweeting, and otherwise sharing with your contacts. I truly appreciate your efforts!
Thank you, Happy Holidays, and Happy New Year!
A short post for the Insecure Writers Support Group this month, all about my current state of affairs and things I think will be interesting to the neurotic writers who pass by blogs like this every month.
I’m looking at new ways to use this blog
So one big change I’m making now (and a reason for the lack of updates) is deciding what I want to use this blog for. Some of my writing tips have gone over well, and I might go back to doing that weekly. I like the idea of previewing others’ writing like I did for the Launch Pad contest – I could see myself doing little previews of upcoming and released indie works.
One thing’s for sure – I can’t do long updates or too frequent ones. Regular updates, yes, but probably not more than once, maybe twice a week. I need to do more actual writing!
No. Not really, anyway. I need to finish the book I’m working on, not start a new one now. I’d rather devote a set amount of time to working on my current book than set a specific word count. I’ll start with 1 hour per day, and see if I can boost that up a bit.
I’m doing some online counseling (best option I have at the moment) and it will spill over onto this blog in some form. I think my writing and my anxiety interact in many ways, and that some tips to deal with one will also help with the other. I’m on the lookout for other blogs that talk about anxiety and writing – there should be some good links with IWSG I would think!
Anyway, that’s my rambling IWSG post for November. If you have some ideas for content for my blog, feel free to leave comments. I’ll be looking around some of your blogs too!
A post of mine regarding Far Flung on John Robin’s blog, Epic Fantasy Writer!
Today I’d like to share more on world-building by means of a guest post from an author I recently connected with—TCC Edwards. You can check out his book, Far Flung, which is has been picked by an Inkshares syndicates and is still funding, at nearly 1/4 of the way to meeting the Quill publication milestone.
How many lists of world-building tips, hints, questions, and resources have you seen on the internet? They’re a bit intimidating, aren’t they? Especially when they’re as exhaustive as the queen of all world-building lists by author Patricia C. Wrede, with questions about politics, science, religion, and many more aspects of your fictional world.
You could spend a lot of time building your world with a list like this, but without proper attention to the story and characters, readers aren’t likely to appreciate the effort. If you are writing a multi-novel…
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